When we young, my mother used to do casual labor at neighboring farms. The experience was different from one neighbor to another as i always studied my mum's emotions after work. There are those women who really looked down on her, frustrated her or even verbally abused her. But there was this particular woman (Muthoni) who was exemplary. She would not only pay her in time but would share some goodies including her old clothes with her.
Muthoni's husband works with the defense forces and from earlier days of their marriage, she lived an admirable life as a housewife. But Muthoni got led astray by her peers and she left her matrimonial home citing denial of conjugal rights by her husband. Muthoni was right. Her husband would take even an year away from home but would consistently send money home. When she left home, she went to my now famous town where she joined other single women in the business. The women introduced her to their usual night outs and Muthoni was excited having never experienced this kind of lifestyle.
To cut the story short, Muthoni ended up contracting HIV and became too sick to being bedridden. Her friends avoided her for they felt she would ruin their business. Having been an orphan, the only home she would go back to was her husband's. Her friends dropped her at the home and spend off. The shock both at home and in the village was immense. Muthoni needed urgent medical attention otherwise she would die. Her one side of body had become paralyzed and she could not walk.
She was rushed to the nearest district hospital where she received emergency treatment and from the doctor's examination, her body was in bad shape and required instant admission. She stuck in hospital for two long months and even when she left hospital, she wasn't healed but the husband had refused to pay her bills. She was brought home still with tubes from her bladder as she could not pee by herself. Its this time when news spread throughout the village and no one from the village wanted to be associated with her. But my mother was. She prepared Kev and they went to visit Muthoni and on her bedside they cried with her and encouraged her.
It was this particular visit that Kev warned mum not to take him again to visit Muthoni. Kev was traumatized on seeing Muthoni in her bedridden state. Anytime he is told that mum is visiting Muthoni he hides so he is not told to accompany her.
Since Muthoni left hospital, her family and villagers have waited for her death but she has not died. Her husband has since remarried and were it not for her father in law, Muthoni would have been kicked out on the streets by her husband. Her father in law told the husband that the only wife he recognizes as part of his family is Muthoni. The husband has since moved Muthoni's cowife away from the home and bought her land elsewhere. He does not support Muthoni directly but supports Muthoni's son who in turn has been patient and helpful to the mother. Muthoni's last daughter who through the influence of her step mum hates her mum saying she broke their family.
Muthoni saw me last as a small girl but she was told by some group of women that i support people like her. She sent mum with a message that if i find time, i should visit her. Last week i visited Muthoni and was glad to see her taking a few steps. She told me what makes her very happy is that she can visit the washroom all by herself. All i could tell her is that she was making steps to complete recovery. Before i left i noticed she was wearing a skirt i had bought for mum. The roles had been reversed, mum was the donor this time.
As i left Muthoni's house, i noticed a nicely built house next to Muthoni's. Mum told me it belonged to Muthoni's co-wife. But mum had been encouraging Muthoni to believe that that house will eventually be hers. Muthoni's case really helped me learn the importance of disclosure. Mum has become my ambassador in the village visiting those who ail from her daughter's disease. The love she offers them is greatly influenced by what i tell her about myself.
The prophets of doom have been awaiting Muthoni's death, but every day she is on the road to complete recovery. Her husband always asks whether she is still alive on phone. Her last words during my visit were; 'When you hear i visited your mum, know that i have recovered'. How i pray that God heals Muthoni completely so that the village would learn that only God can take away life at his chosen time and believe in my Kikuyu proverb that says " Kurwara muno ti gukua"(Being too sick doesn't mean you are going to die).
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